Brave influencer speaks about overcoming domestic abuse and the power of local community

For being only 33 years-old Alannah Kerrigan has lived a whole life in such a short time.

When she was just 21 years-old, she experienced a horrific attack from her then partner that nearly left her for dead.

The popular social media influencer, who has a combined following of almost 79,000 on Instagram and TikTok, has now bravely opened up in an honest and inspiring conversation about how she has overcome life challenges - and how she is using her experience to raise awareness of domestic violence.

The Derry City native, who now lives in County Derry with her husband and young children, has come a long way from the dark days of her early adult life.

Self-employed Alannah is a passionate fundraiser for Foyle Women’s Aid, who offered her so much support throughout her healing journey.

A community wellness event was recently held by Alannah outside Dungiven for Foyle Women’s Aid.

The support she has received as a result was far greater than Alannah could ever have imagined.
“The idea stemmed from TikTok and the community I had built there. I set myself a goal of getting 10,000 followers on the platform by the end of March. I said if I get there by the end of March, for the months of April, May and June, any money I make from the Creator Rewards Program, I’ll donate to Foyle Women’s Aid,” she said.

“Initially, my plan was simply to try and give them some money, as they do amazing work and are a cause very close to my heart. The idea was born from something negative. I had a nasty comment from a troll on one of my videos on TikTok and I did a video reply to it, which gained an amazingly supportive response.

“The comment on my video was very hurtful. At the end of her comment, she said, ‘PS check Tattle Life you dose.’ She was telling me I should go and look at Tattle Life because apparently people were talking about me there. When I got that comment, I was working in my mums office, and I felt physically sick. It really got to me. I’ve been doing social media for five years, posting publicly, and I’ve had little negativity - I’ve been quite lucky. But when she said that, I thought, oh dear, are people in a gossip forum talking about me?”

“ I reached out to another local content creator for advice. She said ‘whatever you do, do not look at that and don't even give that person the satisfaction of knowing that they hurt your feelings’. I tried to just ignore it, but then I drove home from work that day and I sat in my car and I made a video in response to the comment. On my drive home I was thinking, how sad must you be to go on one of these sites? Then I thought, but I've been really sad. I was actively suicidal at one point, and I still didn't go on there.

“As for everything else she’d said - I told her, you’re not going to hurt me. I’ve got very thick skin. I’ve been through domestic abuse at such a young age and there’s nothing anyone’s ever going to say to me that’s more hurtful than what I’ve already heard or believed about myself. Even at my lowest, I didn’t go on that site. I’m not starting now.”

Alannah gained 3,000 new followers in one night as a result of her video.
“The support was incredible, but because I had mentioned domestic abuse I got a lot of comments from people around that as
well. I started to see people coming to my page who wanted to ask questions about my experience. Then I said, you know what would be amazing? If I could get to 10,000 followers on TikTok, and monetize my videos. I thought what if I got paid for videos and gave the money to charity? That was the dream. I didn't know if it was going to happen.

“I didn’t expect for people to be behind it, but overnight I got to 11,000 followers. I was sitting at my kitchen table watching them come in, crying, overwhelmed and excited that people wanted to do this to support a charity that I really care about.” Alannah said as she started to tear up.

“It was just so heartwarming, especially off the back of something so negative. I genuinely believe most people are good and want to see others do well. I felt so full of gratitude. I sat eating dinner with my kids, refreshing the page, watching the followers come in. The kids kind of knew what was going on - I explained it to them, but obviously they’re very young and don’t have social media. I told them I wanted to support this charity, and they asked who it helps. I explained that it helps people whose home isn’t very safe. They asked if that meant there might be a fire. In that moment, I felt so grateful that my children have never had to experience domestic violence - and hopefully never will. They’re too young to understand now, but someday they will.”

With the help of the TikTok community Alannah ended up raising £600 for Foyle Women’s Aid just from views on TikTok videos.

The idea for hosting in-person fundraising events was born out of the community Alannah had built online. The first event she
organised was a Paint and Sip fundraiser at Yum Cakes in Derry, which raised £800 for Foyle Women’s Aid.

“I’ve had a lot of questions about how I healed and how I recovered, so I thought - this is a chance to bring people together. The previous event was brilliant because it combined creativity and connection. That’s when I started planning the Wellness Day for Women’s Aid.

“I'd had a lot of questions about how I healed myself, how I recovered. Yoga, meditation, journaling, and really starting to look
after myself had been a huge part of my personal healing journey. So when I thought about the kind of event I wanted to create, it was only natural that those elements came to mind. I knew how much they had helped me, and I wanted to offer other women the chance to experience that kind of support too. That’s when the idea for the Wellness Day really came together - and once I put the call out, so many incredible people stepped forward to offer their time and services.”

The support was overwhelming. Around 100 women attended, including 15 current service users of Foyle Women’s Aid who were gifted tickets by members of the public through online purchases.

All of this means so much to Alannah who at 21 was subjected to a terrifying attack from her then partner.

At 18, Alannah moved to Manchester for university and met her abuser. At 21, she moved to London with him. Her life seemed to be coming together when she was offered her ‘dream job’ in the heart of the capital - but everything changed after one violent attack.

“There was a violent incident, and that was the end of the relationship. I found myself in London with nobody. Scary place to
be on your own at a young age. Although I knew it was an awful relationship, I didn't see it for what it was. A lot of women when they're in it, don't see it for what it is. I thought it was a bit toxic. I thought he needed help and support. I thought I was going to be the person to save him. I'd been in survival mode for a long time.

“When I moved to London, it felt like a fresh start. He was also moving - in with his parents - and I had found a summer flat
share while we figured things out.

“I had been offered a dream job, working in fashion. I remember moving into the flat right in the middle of London, it was just off Tottenham Court Road, I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. I’d only been there a week when my then-boyfriend assaulted me. I honestly thought he was going to kill me. He beat me up and then strangled me, and in that moment, I was sure that was the end. I’ve never been the same since. That happened on a Saturday night. I was supposed to start my new job on Monday.”

“I took myself to Boots, bought concealer and I tried to cover up the bruises. I had two black eyes and I had a hand print on my throat. I put makeup on and went to my new job. I was a shell of myself. I remember struggling to sit in a chair because my whole body was sore and bruised. And I was supposed to be learning a new role and meeting new people in a massive city.”

“I felt so alone and scared, but I kept going. It was all I had. I told myself - this is what I’ve always wanted, I just have to push through.”

She continued working until the court date later that year, but the weight of it all became too much.

“The closer it got to the court date, the more everything fell apart. I was getting phone calls and emails from the police, and the girls I was renting the room from said they wanted me to move out because one of them didn’t feel safe after I had been attacked in the flat. I ended up essentially homeless.”

“I think starting life in a place like London is difficult for anyone, even if you’re 100%. But for me, it was horrific. I remember getting the tube to work and thinking, I’ll just throw myself in front of the train.”

Alannah ended up staying in England for another three years before moving back home to her family in Derry after what she
describes as a ‘mental breakdown’.

“Looking back I didn't know how or if I was ever going to be okay again. I remember when he got his sentencing it was so lenient and that broke my heart all over again. I felt like after everything I'd been through and then having to relive it all in court, he was essentially given a slap on the wrist, and it felt like I felt violated by the whole process. It was awful. But I’ll never forget the police officer who handled my case. She was lovely. She made me feel listened to and heard. When it was all wrapped up, she said, ‘I’d wish you luck for your life here in London, but I know you’re going to be okay.’ That stuck with me. On the days when I didn’t believe it myself, I held onto her words.”

Alannah credits the work of Foyle Women’s Aid as a massive part of her recovery.

“I really threw myself into healing. It was actually my counsellor who suggested Women’s Aid. At first I said, no, that’s not for me. I’d never been married, I had no children - and I convinced myself that what happened to me ‘wasn’t that bad.’ I had a stereotype in mind of what a domestic violence victim looked like.

“But when I spoke to Women’s Aid, they asked about my circumstances and said, ‘You’re the perfect candidate for the Journey to Freedom programme.’ It’s not group therapy - it’s a course - but obviously, when you’re in a room with people who’ve experienced trauma, things come up. Even though I’d done loads of counselling before, I cannot put into words the life-changing effect that had on me. For the first time, I was in a room with women who truly understood.”

Alannah has since been heavily involved with the charity, speaking at events, informing politicians, healthcare and emergency service professionals and even taking part in a BBC spotlight documentary. Advocating for survivors wherever possible.

“Even in that dark place, I used to journal all the time. I would tell myself I was writing a book about my life - and that meant I had to keep going until I found a happy ending. That’s what got me through it.”

“I’m still working on that every day. But where I am now is miles away from where I thought I’d ever be,” she laughs through happy tears. “And believe it or not - I’m not always crying!”

“I cry now because I'm grateful. I have come so far. I have achieved so much in my personal life and I’m really proud of that. I always wanted someone to look up to and I hope I can be that person for someone. I’ve rebuilt my life. I have three beautiful children and a happy home. I consider myself a success in the ways that matter most. I have more joy in my life than I ever thought possible.”

Thanks to the support of many incredible women and local businesses, Alannah’s recent Wellness Day event raised £3,648.55.
Combined with her previous fundraising efforts, she has now helped raise over £6,300 for Foyle Women’s Aid - a cause that helped her rebuild her life and that she continues to champion for others.

If you’d like to support Foyle Women’s Aid, you can donate here
If you or anyone you know is struggling, you can contact these organisations for help and support. Samaritans &  Foyle Women’s Aid